What About Brad Pitt?

The old adage of the glass being half empty or half full depending on how you see it, permeates life on so many levels. I thought of this when my son returned from the Boardwalk with his girlfriend the other night and was fuming at an occurrence while they were there.

While standing in line for a late movie, a security guard pulled his girlfriend out of line to check her ID for proof of age. Now the recent age rules at the Boardwalk have been front page news for weeks, and my son and his girlfriend were well aware of this. But, both in their 20s, they thought nothing of it.

With a sidewalk brimming with many young faces much younger than his girlfriend’s, it immediately became apparent that the security guard was not exactly after proof of age. If he really wanted to bust someone, he had scores of much riper targets. Obviously, he pulled a pretty, young blonde out of the crowd rather than a scruffy looking teenaged boy.

My son came home furious and his girlfriend was outraged. They were so upset that they abandoned the movie and left the Boardwalk. When they returned home and told me, I said he should be proud that the young man thought his girlfriend was so pretty. And I was glad he had maintained self control and not hit him. Even hormone charged security guards carry handcuffs.

It struck me why they were upset by this. That had the guard pulled me out of line, mistaking me for a 16 year old, it would have absolutely made my day. And had some bottom dweller, freaky guy been standing in line with a hideously ugly girlfriend and a security guard had pulled her out of line to learn her name and flirt a bit, that the freaky guy might have gone home all puffed up for someone thinking his girlfriend was a hottie. And the aesthetically impaired young lady might have had her life’s biggest ego boost to be pulled away from her freaky boyfriend to be flirted with by another.

They would have gone back to the Boardwalk every night for 10 years hoping for a repeat. I would have gone back every night for years hoping for a repeat of mistaken teenage-ness. But, no matter how happy I was, I know my dear husband would have told tales of having to restrain himself from punching anyone that flirts with his wife. His manly muscles would have been flexed and my feminine self esteem would have been boosted. But, for two young, pretty people, it was a sleazy disaster.

During sports last weekend a similar event took place. While on the ice a referee mentioned to one of the players that a woman on the sidelines had some really nice attributes. He elbowed the teenager and gave a man to man snicker. As the young man proceeded to hit him, the referee explained that he didn’t know it was his mother. The glove-pounding son didn’t seem to care.

But I wondered would even this have been different with different players? I discussed with my sons and husband if the woman was ugly would the son have been happy the ref found her divine? No, they said they would have still hit him. If she was beautiful and the ref found her so, they said, no, they would have still hit him.

What if it wasn’t some nameless, middle aged referee that found the guy’s mom a hottie? What if it was someone the young man thought was great? What if it was someone like Usher or Tony Romo or Brad Pitt?

Would he get angry if Brad Pitt was the ref and gave the player a friendly elbowing and commented on what a sugar his mom was? Or would the young man puff up with pride thinking Brad Pitt thought his mom was cool and give Brad Pitt a friendly bump?

Would I, who would have left feeling sleazy if some deadbeat hippie had thought me a cutie, have floated out of the rink with my ego superinflated, while swishing my ponytail and thumbing my nose at Angelina Jolie on the way out the door?

But whether the glass be half empty or half full, in spite of Brad Pitt and my puffed up, ponytail swishing self, my husband and sons claimed they would have still not taken it well....They would have still hit him. Must be true love.